The Monitum is a short legal paragraph that must be included before your vows. It can go in the Welcome & Intro though it’s often slotted in closer to the Vows. It’s a legal requirement and itmust be said by myself and heard by everyone.
This is the wording of The Monitum:
“I am registered by law to solemnise marriages according to law. Before you are joined in marriage, in my presence and the presence of everyone here today, I am to remind you of the formal and permanent nature of the relationship into which you are about to enter. Marriage according to law in Australia is the union of two people, to the exclusion of all others, voluntarily entered into for life.”
It can be broken up and included at different times in your ceremony - for example, the first sentence could be spoken during the Welcome & Introduction if you prefer. Then the 2nd and 3rd sentences could be said just before the vows.
There are two different kinds of “Asking”. It’s not a legal requirement, so you don’t have to have this element if it doesn’t resonate with you.
The Asking of The Couple
If you’d like to have a part in your ceremony where you both say “I Do!” or “We do!” then we can segue seamlessly into this straight after The Monitum.
Some example wordings are:
“So do you promise to team up from this day on, and always be there for each other? Will you nurture your relationship, encourage the best from each other and support each other during the tough times? Will you laugh together, continue to go on lovely dates, and most importantly will you promise to love each other until you’re old and wrinkly, and give everything you have to make this marriage a happy one?“ // Couple say “We do!”
“Do you promise to travel through the adventures of life, standing by each other’s side? Do you offer your loyalty, tenderness, kindness and love?”
“Do you A/B promise to be a fabulous wife/husband? Will you love A/B even when they *fill in with the thing that drives you crazy? Will you be his/her equal partner, work as hard on the relationship as you do everything else in life, be his/her loudest and most supportive cheerleader, partner in crime, and team mate for life?”
Do you promise to always be committed to NAME throughout your marriage? Will you tolerate the spoons being placed the wrong way in the drawer, will you endure her crap TV addiction, stand by each other no matter - even if that means a Geelong/ Tigers Grand Final?” *we can tailor the wording & specifics to you two
The Asking of Friends & Family
You can have an Asking that your guests respond to as well! Here’s an example, though I’m more than happy to create one more personal to you both:
Everyone here today has been invited because you’re important to NAME & NAME. You’re their favourite bunch of people, their community, their cheer squad. And so I ask of you some questions! Do you promise to support NAME & NAME as they launch into the future as a married couple? Will you continue to encourage and love them through the ups and downs? If you will, let’s hear a big loud YES!!”
Declaration of Marriage & Kiss
The Declaration is the awesome moment in your ceremony when you are pronounced married! This is usually followed by your first kiss as a married couple.
Can be worded like this:
“NAME & NAME, it now it gives me great pleasure to pronounce you wife & wife/ husband & husband / husband & wife / married at last / wifey & wifey / partners for life / partners in crime”…um basically I will just say whatever you want me to say.
The kiss can be unannounced or I can say something to prompt you like “Now’s the best part when you two get to kiss!!”